What’s So Fabulous About Forty? I’ll Tell Ya

Goodbye thirties. You were memorable…tiring but memorable. A fairytale wedding was followed by nearly a decade of learning to function in a hazy state of sleep deprived consciousness.  I remember a steady blur of diaper changing, breast feeding, doctor visits, 2am, 3am and 4am wake-ups, first steps and stumbles, extreme highs and some pretty low lows.

There was no “ME-time” in my 30’s. There was no time for selfishness. There was barely any time for a shower. I proudly spent those years making sure I kept the two most important people in my life alive, healthy and happy. Today when I hear their laughter and feel their tiny hugs and kisses I know it was worth it. I did alright.

But now I’m forty, Bitch! (channeling my inner Britney #VMA2016 comeback) I feel sooooo close to not caring what anyone thinks of me (total #IDontGiveAShit mindset must happen in your 50’s). The diaper bag is a thing of the distant past. I have my boobs back (with a little help) and so far I’m not completely falling apart. Knees, check! Back, check check! Hips….well you can’t have it all.

I have more balance in my life than I’ve ever had before. All of my personas (mother, wife, TV host, daughter, sister, friend) are working together. No one is fighting for first place. Not sure how long this will last, but I plan on appreciating it while it’s here.

Now that ALL the birthday candles have been blown out I get to reflect on what I’ve learned.

In my forties I promise to:

-Remember to respect that spontaneous 20 something girl that still lives in me. When she tells me she feels like dancing on the bar…I say heck yeah!

-Remember that being a badass (or striving to be one) is not something to apologize for. In fact apologizing is over-rated.

-Remember that having a happy home is the only remedy for a shitty work day. Home is where this heart is.

-Remember that perfect is fiction and pretending to be perfect is boring.

-Remember that I have the things I need because I had the courage to go after the things I wanted. Keep moving forward. You’re never too old. It’s never too late.

-Remember that in order to be a good caretaker, the “taker carer” must take care of herself first. Say that one 3 times super-fast.

-Remember that respect is a requirement, not a “nice-to-have”. Kill them with kindness, but let them know you could kick their ass if you wanted to.

-Remember that over-planning is overrated. Bring on the travel. Bring on the adventures.

-Remember to surround yourself with strong, confident and fun women… they will lift you up when you start to slip. We all slip. Life is slippery.

-Remember to only take advice from those you truly trust and admire. When they pass judgment, take it seriously.

-Remember that no matter how busy life gets, make time for those you care about and be prepared to say f*&%$-off to those who don’t do the same for you. Better to think it rather than actually say it. Get rid of the excess…they weigh you down.

Then there were the few constants in my 20’s and 30’s that got me through the tough times….love big, embrace change, seek adventure. I’m going to keep rolling with these 🙂

Cheers to the next 10!


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